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C G F G There's a man I know who makes the common man look like a slob C G F G In the beginning there was nothing until a roundhouse kick convinced nothing to get a job C G F G This man's been known to k**l two rocks with only just one bird C G F G He never uses spell check, when there's a discrepancy, Oxford changes how to spell the word C G F G You may see children peeing their names in snow upon the street C G F G This man just laughs and pees his name into asphalt and concrete strum choruses C G F G Carlos Ray Norris, better known to you as Chuck C G F G He's kind of like an owl, in that he doesn't give a...hoot C G F G His cowboy boots are made from genuine cowboys C G F G When he doesn't like what he hears he makes the universe turn down the noise C G F G He's the Texas Ranger named Walker, the most alpha in Delta Force C G F G When God wasn't sure about humanity, he asked Chuck to right the course C G F G Chuck's shadow used to follow him closely, then he beat it up, now it stands 15 feet behind C G F G He's never been in a problem he can't get out of, by simply using the power of his mind C G F G Waldo used to be a public figure before Chuck forced him to hide C G F G Have you heard about the cobra that bit Chuck's leg, after days of excruciating pain the cobra died C G F G Mr. Norris has been known to strangle his enemies with a cordless phone C G F G Once he went into space to seek alien life, now we unequivocally are alone C G F G Carlos Ray Norris, better known to you as Chuck C G F G He's kind of like a honey badger, in that he doesn't give...to charity C G F G He's a rarity, cooks minute rice in 30 seconds or less C G F G When you go to see Saint Peter, he'll ask how you think you did on Chuck's little test C G F G He could have beaten Bruce Lee and changed the title of the movie to Way of the Norris C G F G But he wanted to give the audience something they would never see again in order not to bore us C G F G Santa Claus spends the entire year trying to be good enough to make Chuck Norris' list C G F G You thought it was food but the quickest way to a man's heart is clearly with Chuck Norris' fist C G F G When exposed to the elements Chuck never gets frostbite, he smiles and bites the frost C G F G He once had a staring contest with a statue, that statue overwhelmingly lost C G F G In ancient Greece he punched a cyclops straight between the eye C G F G Many years later, he invented the airplane because he was tired of being the only man who could fly F G F G Chuck Norris was exposed to Coronavirus, now Coronavirus is stuck in quarantine F G F G Chuck will never explain himself, he just demands that you know what he means... C G F G Carlos Ray Norris, better known to you as Chuck C G F G He's kind of like a death row inmate in that he doesn't give...a reason for his crime C G F G He transcends time, watches 60 minutes in about 20 minutes or so C G F G He's never had to trim his beard because his beard is too afraid to grow C G F G He once kicked a horse in the chin and now the world knows the mighty giraffe C G F G C He once told a joke that was so funny it taught the whole world how to laugh... Chuck Norris...