Your Friendly Liberal Neighborhood Ku Klux Klan

C Is there a klavern in your town, in your town? G7 If not, then why not have us down, have us down? C F F#dim You'll never recognize us, there's a smile upon our face C A7 D7 G7 We're changin all our dirty sheets and a-cleanin up the place C C7 F F#dim Yep, since we got a lawyer and a public relations man, C A7 D7 G7 C We're your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux Klan C F Fm C Yes, we're your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux Klan C A7 D7 G7 Ever since we got that lawyer and that public relations man C C7 F F#dim ' course we did shoot one reporter, but he was just obscene C A7 D7 G7 C And you can't call us no filthy names - What does Anglo-Saxon mean? Spoken N.C. Allemande left, allemande right, the Ladies' Auxilliary is meetin' tonight N.C. 'Cause the Klan's collected so much cash that now, by gum, we're rich N.C. white trash C F F#dim Now, we've heard it said our leadership's not qualified to lead C A7 D7 G7 Well I'm tellin you that just ain't true - Why three of them can read C F F#dim Take a Grand Exalted Dragon, now some folks think he's bad, C A7 D7 Well, you should meet his sweet old mother, and her brother, G7 C who's his dad. C F Fm C Yes, they're your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux Klan C A7 D7 G7 And he's gonna run for governor 'soon as he's out of the can C C7 F F#dim We're all from fine old families, the pride of all these hills C A7 D7 G7 C Yes, seven generations at the same illegal stills Spoken N.C. Had a little rally the other night, Shot up town in a fury N.C. Luke's arrested, Pa's on trial, And the rest of us are on the jury. C F F#dim Now, we've heard them call us deadbeats, and we'd like to say we're not C A7 D7 G7 We'll all stand on our record, and that's one thing we've all got C F F#dim And we only have that arsenal so that you won't raise no fuss C A7 And if you don't like that, then call the cops D7 G7 D 'Cause the chances are, they're us. C F Fm C Yes we're your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux Klan C A7 D7 G7 But somehow we went from the fire to the fryin pan C C7 F F#dim We never learned to hold a job, and we never learned to write C A7 But boy, we sure have learned to use the ropes, D7 G7 C 'cause we use them every night. Spoken N.C. Now, when Congress calls, you don't get stuck; N.C. just start confessin and pass the buck N.C. The Klug blames the Klakon, the Klaxon blames the Kleagle, N.C. the Kleagle blames the Grand Imperial Eagle N.C. The Eagle blames the Wizard, the Wizard blames the Dragon N.C. The Dragon takes the blame, but he's just braggin C F F#dim Now, we're out to show the Congress that we're oh so nice and meek C A7 D7 G7 Why we never even take the Fifth, 'cause we drank that all last week C F F#dim And you'll never hear us shootin or hangin people high C A7 D7 G7 C 'Cause we're learnin to respect the law and to have an ali bi Spoken N.C. Come, come, come, come to the church in the wildwood... (in background) N.C. Oh, those dirty, lyin witnesses, Lord, forgive them what they speak N.C. We would go to church and pray for them, 'cept we blew it up last week C F Fm C Yes, we're your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux Klan C A7 D7 G7 And we sure do thank that lawyer and that public relations man C C7 F F#dim So, we're sorry that we hung them, but they did have quite a tan C A7 C A7 And it sure confused your friendly, liberal, misunderstood F F#dim Your friendly neighborhood Klan who says, C A7 What's wrong with a hood? F Fm Your friendly, liberal, neighborhood Ku Klux – N.C. grab your Cadillac and head for the hills. C