A Heist Not Attempted Before

C C This is a story - I promise it's true G F A tale of a crafty ol' robbery crew C They could clean any safe in a minute or two G F* C They had hit every bank... and post office too C They had snatched every diamond and valuable gem G F Seemed like nothing could offer a challenge to them C Then one Christmas they hatched a most brilliant score: G F* C A plan for a heist... not attempted before Am G So they painted their guns white and learned how to ski F G They got their disguise from a Christmas tree Am G Then they went to the North Pole as fast as could be F G* They were going to rob... Santa's toy factory C C They traveled through blizzards for over a week G F 'Til they saw Santa's factory up on a peak C By the candy cane fence they then started to sneak G F* C Seemed security there... was surprisingly weak C 'Round the factory building came elves on the way G F Bringing bags full of toys down to Santa's big sleigh C They were busy as bees but they froze at the sound G F* C When our robbery crew... shouted "down on the ground!" Am G Then a plan as efficient as clockwork commenced F G Where they melted away the elves' snowball defense Am G Then they hog tied the reindeers inside of their fence F G* C And the helpers soon slept... thanks to gas in the vents Dm C They blew up the fuse box and turned on night vision Dm C Then they utilized shape charges to get inside F Am They drilled through security doors with precision F G Then manhandled Santa and had him tied oh yeah C C Santa was tougher to crack than they thought G F He just wouldn't surrender the code for the vault C Though they stepped on his glasses so he couldn't see G F* C And an ice pick was used... to crack open his knee C After water board torture and kicking his balls G F After hours of smashing his face into walls C They finally realized just what did the trick G F* C When they threatened cut off... Santa's beard, so thick Am G So he gave up the code and they all gathered 'round F G To find out just what treasures were there to be found Am G As the vault door swung open they realized why Am G A heist against Santa had never been tried Am G G* They looked in the vault and they all felt like rookies N.C. C See, inside there were just... lots of milk and cookies ************************************ | * strum once ************************************